Sunday, August 22, 2010

How to Survive a Heartache

You have been crying for days, thinking about what you’ve done wrong or what you should have done to work it out with your partner. No matter how much you try to figure it out, you just cannot seem to find the perfect reason why you both ended up in separate ways. Is it your fault or his fault? Have you given too much, ending up being taken for granted, eventually dumped? No matter what the reasons are, you must go on. Find ways to face a new chapter in life with anticipation and optimism.

That is, after exhausting all the possible efforts of reconciliation. Of course you would try to fix it initially, but if it does not yield favorable results, might as well say, enough.

Now let us talk about moving on. Nobody would seriously say that she’d had it the easy way after breaking up. Not unless, it is not a serious relationship. Of course, you will be depressed. You may not even want to comb your hair or even brush your teeth. Instead, all you want to do is lay in bed; feeling sorry for yourself.
But hey! It is not the end of the world. It may be the end of one chapter but it is a start of another meaningful phase of your life. You may get stuck in the stage of denial for some time, but it cannot go on like that forever. Get up and move on. Start by accepting your situation as it is. From there you can start; when you can finally face the reality that you are now alone.

As a start you may want to get busy on something you are good at. Perhaps joining some sports activities, try catching up with your friends and if you have the heart, visit some orphanage or a home. You’ll never know how gratifying it may be, knowing that your presence can make a difference to people who are in need of some caring and attention.

Instead of wasting your time thinking about your ex, make it a “me” time from now on. You can try trekking, wall climbing, bungee jumping, even sky diving! You may want to cut your hair for a change and dress up for some wining and dining with your friends. There is no limit as to what you can do, for as long as you focus on moving on positively.

Greatest Songs from the MusicalsYou may be wondering where is the ‘dating’ part again. Nada. Not until you have fully recovered from your ex. It is only then when you may fall for someone, not as a rebound from your previous relationship, but as you become ready to commit yourself without the trace of your past. It would only be unfair if you are going to keep on looking back, much more compare.

Allow yourself some recovery time. Contemplate on the past; what’s gone wrong and how are you going to handle it this time? Bear in mind that you should not lose your identity in the process. You must be a complementary to your partner, not a shadow. Set your limits but be ready to give in to some compromise, when necessary.

One of the greatest pains in life is not having the opportunity to be with the one you love, but it is an ultimate suicide dwelling on the possibility when you know the feeling is not reciprocated.

Do not be afraid. Relax and take it easy. Let the nature take its course. In a right time and place, somebody will propose, “I want to grow old with you.” Now, how's that for a meaningful lifetime commitment?

Friday, May 21, 2010

First Day of School, And Beyond...

Paper, pencil, crayons and sharpener...checked! Now what? Aren't we all excited with our child's first day of school? And probably weeks, following that. We, parents are often more excited than our child. But, what are we really should be prepared for? Every child has his own attitude towards schooling. Yours may be eager and excited; others may be apprehensive, worse, scared. We should set the minds of our children. Let them play school at home. Prepare them slowly as to what may happen when they actually go to school. Explain why he needs to be there at the same time, how fun it is going to be once he gets used to it.

Take into consideration that they may feel uneasy as everything is new to them. Surroundings they’ve never been and face they’ve never seen before. They will be adjusting and eventually fitting into a bigger community. They will be outside your home, alone for the first time. It may be overwhelming, considering that they will be entering into a new phase of life, where they will be on their own, no mommy or nanny to tend to their every need or whim. They may be bullied by much bigger classmates or they can be a teacher’s pet.
Whatever it is that our children is becoming at school, we should always support them. Show them what is right when they are getting slack and never forget to praise them when they get home with a "star". One thing we should not do is  force our children into becoming an “A” student to the point of  losing ‘play time’ in their formative years, just to meet the standard we've set. Let them learn and progress on their own; guide them but do not rob them of their younger years by putting too much pressure too soon. It is the foundation that will help them mold into a better individual later on in life.

We do not want them to look back with such a bitter taste in the mouth, but reminisce with a smile for having such a wonderful experience.

Monday, May 17, 2010

How To Survive A Difficult Pregnancy

Pregnancy is always discussed by women. From conceiving up to delivery. There were lucky moms who made it to the delivery rooms without much of a fuss, while there are others who nearly swears to never get pregnant again. From the first month on, it was a struggle. Morning sickness, headache, backache, gas pain and ultra sensitivity to name it all. A friend once told me, there was a time (as in all at the same time) that she's got hot water bottle on her back, ice bag on her head and another little hot pack on her upper tummy just to ease the pain. Her doctor had almost run out of advise as to how to alleviate the pain she's experiencing.
But, no matter how hard the pregnancy is, there is always a brighter side to look forward to. Just the thought of adding another member to your family is a gift in itself. Despite the difficulties, you have to find a way to cheer yourself up and think about the people who makes you feel cherished. They are always there to support you and makes you feel beautiful despite the bulge and swelling feet. Think of delightful pregnancy stories you have heard from other people. Try not to think of the difficulties but the rewards. Also, it does not hurt to ask for help when it's getting too much for you to handle. Get your partner to do things that you cannot, considering your condition. Let him prepare meals, wash the dishes and do the laundry. Yes, milk it for what its worth! Finally, take comfort on the thought that all the difficulties are temporary. They will be outweighed by the joy and happiness when your cherub has finally arrived. When you look back, you will only have one thing to say...yes - it is all worth it all along.


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Be it good or bad, if it is the reality and the just simply have to face it. You can run, but you can't hide.